Monday, March 1, 2010

One A Week Review #9: Sorority Row

 This week, I enjoyed the quelle campy Sorority Row. Instead of a review, I thought I'd just share my play-by-play observations as I "live-Tweeted" my viewing experience...

To clarify, I did enjoy it. Certainly better than I expected and the ending did make a bit of sense (though the little twist at the end is profoundly stupid) and the acting was pretty good. The actresses I went in viewing as "The Nepotism Twins," Briana Evigan and Rumer Willis, are offically okay in my book after this, so that's downright startling. The "original" The House on Sorority Row had a head in a toilet, and nothing here beat that.

Live-tweeting (for me at least) isn't about praise or critical thought. It's about snark. I confess this to be my warts-and-all stream of pure snark. I kept it clean, and probably should have cut loose more, but there you have it. Enjoy!

 
  • Hmm, it says this film is rated R partially due to "partying." When did Musical Chairs become SO objectionable? 
  • Quote from movie: "You cheat on one Theta, you cheat on every Theta." Well, that's at least efficient...
  • The nice thing about characters like the ones in SORORITY ROW is you look FORWARD to their eventual demise. The uglier the better...     
  • I forgot Carrie Fisher was in this. In real life I'm positive she could kick the crazy bad guys ass.
  • Someone just said "I'd definitely have a sip of that MILF-shake"- SORORITY ROW is equal opportunity. You want the Frat Boys to die too.         
  • Two references to Facebook so far in here... trying to remember if some flick five years ago namechecked Friendster to be so "au courant"?       
  • Again: anyone else think a Carrie Fisher-Margot Kidder talk show would be a thing of crazy beauty? (Emphasis on "crazy")
  • Why, I think they're implying the promiscuous Sorority Sister might just have low self-esteem... I'm shocked and saddened.
  • I think the other sorority sister is getting dumped by her boyfriend through HIS DAD. That's cold, man. COLD.
  • It's a slasher movie with a shower scene set in a sorority house. My god, why did no one ever think of this before???
  • I do admire these girls' party ethic. Sure, someone's messing with them, but there's liquor to be drunk...
  • As someone who grew up on 70s/80s movies, it's refreshing to see nudity again in a movie set in college. It's honest sleaze. 
  • Slashers in movies who kill people ancillary to the ones they're after all ways seem unsporting to me...     
  • Well I guess the sorority girl being told her boyfriend is dead 20 min post-breakup saves her from those awkward "running into you" moments.  
  • Wow this movie is just STUPID. Spending an hour with it is about as soporific as a disco nap, so props for that.
  • The characters in this movie should HOPE they get knocked off. Otherwise they have to clean up the mess left after that party... 
  • Wondering who just unfollowed me, if it was because I'm tweeting about SORORITY ROW, and mostly... is it a comment on my taste?
  • Death by tire iron, beer bottle, car, and road flare so far... it's a monster truck rally of a slasher movie...
  • Their friends are getting knocked off but they have time for a hair-pulling cat fight in negligees? How did this movie not make more money?
  • A pissed-off Carrie Fisher with a shot gun is the first genuinely thrilling and threatening thing in this movie...
  • @loreestark I groove on "Fantastically Awful," so really I'm having a damned good time, all told...          
  • So the Queen-Bee Bizznitch's boyfriend is a jerk? I'm shocked. Never saw THAT one coming either...            
  • Oh, so THAT'S who the killer is? I woulda seen that coming if either I or the screenwriter was really bothering to pay attention... 
  • Oh, sure, he knocked everyone off for her. I still think she's gonna break up with him...  
  • Okay, that guy either is a European with a crap American accent or has a bit of a speech impediment...    
  • @zacsanford this is bad... and I'm enjoying it immensely...
  • I shoulda left for this evening's events already but I do so love a good bad movie... 
  • @zacsanford I've had some good giggles... I didn't expect the Rumer Willis character to make it, though... is that the twist ending?       
  • Umm, no one really catwalks in slow-motion away from a burning building... seriously. They don't.          
  • Well, thank you, SORORITY ROW, for being bad and entertaining me. I only meant to watch 30 minutes of you before I got to work...  
  • The DVD outtakes include footage of waterballoons thrown at cleavage that DIDN'T break... Criterion collection never has extras like that.       

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